Get Saucy! in 37 Easy Steps

Another non-rant, please forgive me, but I really like food:

Soooo much.

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Tomatoes!

Cut in half.

dun! dun dun dun,

dun dun DUN, dun

dun dun, dun dun

dun duh-duh-dun

dum TETRIS SONG!

All halved-up! I had to add a couple of non-roma tomatoes to even things up, making about 20 in all.

"You don't have to help me peel garlic mom... really, its fine I don't mind... alright, then I'm putting you in the blog"

"What's a blog?"

I sliced the garlic thin like one recipe suggested. Seasalt and pepper liberally.

I pressed garlic for the other one, to see if it made a difference.

Ow, garlic fingers. I guess my skin is sensitive.

Vertical cut.

Horizontal cut. I used two medium-to-large-ish onions.

Finished up the dicing and onionized both pans evenly.

Rosemarinization. I also drizzled some really good olive oil over the top + more salt and pepper, a little dry oregano, and the last of the herbs de provence.

Roasted for about an hour at 375, this is at the 40 minute mark.

All roasted.

Detail shot; Food Network, eat your heart out.

I then conducted a study of the to pans to see if the garlic strategy made a difference. It didn't; I reccomend pressing because its alot faster.

I scooped it into a bowl and hoped I could mash it so I didn't have to run the blender late at night.

I'm not stirring, I'm agitating.

Denuding the basil.

Basilicious.

Basilfetti!

Chiffonadization.

Tongue's-eye view of the course sauce.

No dice on the mashing, but the blender didn't even take 30 seconds.

It was a little chunky and the smell was fucking out-of-this-world.

Naturally, I had to investigate. It was amazing.

FINISH! Or, well, almost there.

A little basil-love to garnish.

Then, reality set in. It did need a little more salt, but I usually feel things need a little more salt.

Om-fucking-nom. A little time-consuming, but it was worth it. I was really surprised at how sweet the sauce came out, it was like condensced summer.

I hope you all abandon your jars, and celebrate the late-summer tomato glut with sauces of your own.

"Six Reasons God Exists"

This is a response to an ad I keep seeing offering "six reasons that 'prove'" God's existence. You can find it here: http://www.everystudent.com/features/isthere.html?gclid=CM2bh_3i1JwCFRgSawodw2RNEA

I'm not here to disprove God's existence, as that is pretty much impossible, but these claims to evidence are demostrably false and misleading. God's existence isn't provable, some religious people say that this is the point. Further, this advertisement posits the existence of the Christian God specifically, but I'll deal with its egocentrism later in this post. I think for clarity's sake it would be best to address the claims in the order they were presented:

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1. "The complexity of our planet points to a deliberate Designer who not only created our universe, but sustains it today."

The Earth... The author suggests that the earth's size and distance from the sun are "perfect" for humans, because it keeps the planet at a livable temperature and holds a thin atmosphere of gaseous Nitrogen and Oxygen. This begs the question: "Why did this same God make the fossil record appear as though life was responsible for creating these livable conditions?" The fossil record suggests that most of our atmosphere's gaseous Oxygen and Nitrogen are byproducts of the metabolism of primeval bacteria, algae, and fungae, and further suggests that life adapted to these conditions and not the other way around. The author also suggests that without the moon the oceans would "stagnate," which simply isn't true; ocean currents might be different without lunar tides, but they wouldn't go away.

Water... The author has transposed cause and effect again; she notes some of the remarkable properties of water which allowed life to develop, as though water was made to suit life. Even in the bible God makes the waters first, before he even gets to people. The author also notes that

"Ninety-seven percent of the Earth's water is in the oceans. But on our Earth, there is a system designed which removes salt from the water and then distributes that water throughout the globe. Evaporation takes the ocean waters, leaving the salt, and forms clouds which are easily moved by the wind to disperse water over the land, for vegetation, animals and people"

This begs the question though, why make 97% of the water marine? Why, if land life is so special, not make more land and more fresh water. Why make the seas saline at all? It seems rather inconvenient if we're supposed to have dominion over the whole earth.

The human brain... The author points out that the human brain is extremely complex, and that "[t]he brain functions differently than other organs. There is an inteligence to it..." Why, in all its complexity, does our nervous system have all of these apparently vestigeal bits? Why are there so many substances capable of immitating neurochemicals and impairing or altering the brain's function? Why would we hallucinate? And while it is complex, the author points out a great deal of information that the brain receives it ignores; why were we not designed with a prefrontal cortex capable of cognizing more information per second?

The eye... Which "can distinguish between seven million colors" and processes millions of messages per second. The eye certainly handles a lot of information, most of which the brain ignores, which begs the question: why doesn't the eye only perceive relevant stimuli? As for the millions of colors; colors are not categories which exist objectively in the world, they are constructions of the human mind; the eye can dectect very subtle differences in light wavelength, but this seven million number is meaningless. The author goes on to suggest that evolution cannot fully explain the "initial source" of the eye or brain, or the start of life from nonliving matter. Assuming that the assertion about evolution "not fully explaining" is true, suggesting that there is not an adequate explanation does not mean God is the explanation, it merely means that there is not currently an adequate explantion. However, evolutionary biology can model very well how the eye might have originated as a simple light detecting cell or cluster of cells like the maggot's eye, which they use to avoid light by bobbing back and forth. For a video of a rather handsome young Richard Dawkins illustrating such a model click here.

2. "The universe had a start - what caused it?" The author points out that science has yet to answer this question and then quotes several scientists out of context about how powerful the big bang was, and how we cannot fully know its cause. The problem with her suggestion is two fold: 1. If there is no explanation for the cause of the universe coming into being, it does not mean that God is the only explanation, or even that God is a good or probable explanation. 2. If God did create the universe from nothing, what caused God to come into being. While the cause of the universe is unknowable, and conluding that it must be due to God without providing an explanation for God's own existence is patently ridiculous.
3. "The universe operates by uniform laws of nature. Why does it?" The author points out that the same natural laws apply everywhere, and quotes Richard Feynman "The fact that there are rules at all is a kind of miracle." Bringing up Richard Feynman (by quoting him out of context) undercuts the author's assertion fundamentally, because Feynman is talking here about the fundamental strangeness of quantum electrodynamics; there aren't definite particles in specific places, and the forces that apply on the scale that we're used to, cannot be easily reconciled with the strong and weak forces. Why aren't the uniform laws of nature on the quantum scale, the same on the macroscopic scale?
4. "The DNA code informs, programs a cell's behavior." The author simplistically explains that DNA is a "programming code" for the cell that are "chemicals that instruct" the cell, dictating its behavior. "Natural, biological causes are completely lacking as an explanation when programmed information is involved. You cannot find instruction, precise information like this, without someone intentionally constructing it." First of all, DNA codes for protein. Period. Protein synthesis is pretty well understood, and while it does dictate much about the cell's behavior, the programming language analogy is erroneous, because DNA is does not code for behaviors, but rather, components. Secondly, if this precise code so clearly points to an intentional constructor, like God, why would DNA have so many blunders like genetic disease, transcription errors, mutations, and DNA for unexpressed proteins? Finally, even if natural, biological causes were inadequate when "programmed information" is involved, that does not mean there aren't any sufficient natural, biological explanations that have yet to be proposed, and it is utterly absurd to conclude that because one does not understand any natural, biological explanations for natural, biological phenomena that the only alternative is a supernatural explanation.
5. We know God exists because he pursues us. He is constantly initiating and seeking for us to come to him. The author suggests that atheists are interested in refuting religion, because God is present in their thoughts. She posits further that God created us with the intention of having us know him. I am interested in refuting religious claims, because the onus of proof for any claim lies on the one positing the claim, and religious ideas dominate every major institution in society, with no evidence to speak of. I am bombarded constantly with theist propaganda, and every media representation of Atheists paints us a amoral, bitter curmudgeons. On that note, if God created us with the intention of having us knowing him, why require this irrational faith business; why not simply make himself known to everyone by manifesting conclusively in everyone's lives (booming voices from the sky, burning bushes, impregnating virgins, dictating stone tablets and the like). Why does God appear to Christians as Jesus or YHWH, but to Hindus as Shiva or Krishna? Why didn't Jesus, when resurected, just go tell everyone his good news, and why, if he controls everything, did he prevent testimonies of his acts from being written until at least 30 years after his death. It seems to me, that if God wanted to be known, he sort of confused things a bit.
6. "Unlike any other revelation of God, Jesus Christ is the clearest, most specific picture of God revealing himself to us." What? Why are their contradictions between the gospels? What the hell is with this God, but the son of God thing, and how the hell could something so essential to God's nature only be described in the vaguest terms? If it is a revelation from God, why wasn't it written sooner, and what makes the testaments of the bible more legitimate than their contemporary gospels. Really, most other religious texts are equally aged and ambiguous, but the claim to the uniqueness of the bible in clarity, or specificity is plainly a contrivance.

PIZZA!

Ok you got me, this isn't a rant at all; I just like Pizza. I will say, though, that nothing fills me with more righteous rage than frozen pizza, and ready-made dough. Pizza is one of the easiest, cheapest, and most fun doughs to make at home. So here's a couple of pizzas I've made to inspire you to take back pizza from the delivery trucks:

First, dough:

3 cups flour, sifted (I like bread flour best, and barley works well if you don't do gluten)

2-2 1/2 tsp yeast (the living kind, that's ~one of those little packages)

1/2 tsp sugar

1/2 tsp salt

1 and 1/2 cups VERY warm water

(optional = 2tsp gluten powder for a chewier crust)

1 Tbs oil (I like olive, canola and soy work fine)

1. In a big bowl sift together the flour (or flours if you like to mix things up, I had success with a 2/1 barley/buckwheat mix ), and gluten (this is optional, I like to add it in if I'm making a deep-dish thing).

2. Make a well in the middle of the flour mix (imagine that the flour mix is mashed potatoes and your making a gravy well; try not to go all the way to the bottom) this is your yeast home.

3. Add a half cup of VERY warm water to your well and add the yeast, salt, and sugar, and stir just the well. Its ok if a little flour mixes in, but at this stage your just trying to "wake up" the yeast. Let the well alone for about five minutes, or until it gets nice and foamy.

4. Slowly stir in flour from the sides and add the rest of the VERY warm water and the oil. A wooden spoon is your best friend. You want the mixture to be as smooth and lumpless as possible and you shouldn't feel pressured mix in all of the flour; just stir until you have a nice, slightly sticky dough.

5. Flour your hands (and the dough/bowl if your dough is really sticky) and knead the dough for a good ten minutes.

6. Cover the bowl with a towel and let it stand in a warm place for an hour or so (until it doubles in size).

7. Punch it down and knead it for another ten minutes. If you want to make your pizza later in the week you can put it in the fridge at this point, and if your going to make it in the next three months,f freeze it.

8. If you froze your dough, let it thaw overnight in the fridge. Let your dough rise again in a warm place for about an hour (it might take a little longer if your dough's been in the fridge).

9. Punch it down and role it out.

But what to top it with? Well, I've got two examples. One's for when your feeling really aventurous and the other is a little more "traditional":

First, ADVENTURE!

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This is a Rosemary Mashed-Potato Pizza with Vegan Bechamel and Artichoke Hearts. It looks a little funky, but its delicious. I stumbled on some restaurant food blog, and I happened to have recently "borrowed" a jar of artichoke hearts, so I decided to expiriment.

First, you boil potatoes (you could also try baking them, but I haven't yet) then drain and mash them, add a lot of rosemary, salt and pepper, and about 8 cloves of garlic either pressed or minced fine. Next make a bechamel (which is just flour and a little nutritional yeast cooked in oil, then a little mylk (coconut mylk is killer) salt, pepper, and nutmeg stirred in; the ppk has a recipe with onions, but you could do the same thing with garlic). Then, slice your artichoke hearts thin. On you rolled-out dough, spread your mashed potatoes, embed your artichoke hearts (really press 'em in there or the tips will burn), and then cover it with your bechamel sauce. Bake at 400 for about 12 minutes.

Next, TRADITION!

Sun Dried Tomato Pesto and a Shit-Ton of Toppings Pizza, not actually very traditional at all. Many people have warned me that overloading one's pizza with toppings will make your pizza soggy in the middle, and confuse the pallet; to them I say "FAH, I tire of your lies!" In all seriousness though, lots of toppings means that you cant really pick up the pizza without it flopping a little, but the crust was not remotely soggy.

For the pesto we used about three handfulls of slivered almonds (we were making 2 pizzas, so adjust accordingly), which we blended with a little olive oil until they were smooth. We soaked about 2 cups of sun-dried tomatoes until they were soft, then drained them and reserved a little of the liquid. We blended them in with almonds, and added enough of the reserve liquid to make it smooth, but still a thick paste. We spread that on the rolled out dough, then loaded the pizzas up with toppings: Basil, Zuchini, Crimini Mushrooms, Red Onion, Bell Pepper, Garlic, and Tempeh that I seasoned with a little soy sauce, in that order (Basil on the bottom so it doesn't burn). We baked this bad boy at 400 for about fifteen minutes.

In closing, free your pizza from corporate rule.

Really? Really?

So I have white privilege. I know that I come from a place of privilege when I speak about race, but this shit is fucked up:

First of all, referring to the Jim Crow South to make a political point is pretty damned insensitive on a good day. Trivializing the experience of segregation into a division of water fountains, is also pretty messed up. Then on top of all of that, and here's the key thing, the experience of gay Americans is not comprable to segregation in almost any regard.

Additionally, racism is still very real in America (e.g. this fucking cartoon), and a biracial president does not mean that race based discrimination is over; I feel that this cartoon trivializes racism on several levels.

On top of that, most of the stuff that happens to the gays, happens to the rest of the queer community, and we all got left out.

Dear Center for American Progress,

Get fucked. I hope the experience is so liberating that you stop saying fucked up shit.

Regards,

Sam